Chapter Nineteen: Expecting

Nausea.

Weight gain.

Missed period.

The symptoms had all lined up.  My diagnosis was textbook-simple.

I stared at myself in the mirror.  The flutters in my stomach could be the last remnants of morning sickness, or nerves.  I tried to  gauge  what I was feeling. 

 Happy?  No.  Worried?  No.

There should be a word for being both delirious with joy and terrified beyond reason.

I flopped back down on the bed.  Reece slept on, as he did every morning, breathing a slow steady rhythm that I had memorized.

"Reece…” I said, stroking his cheek.

Reece stirred, a smile tugging the corners of his lips. “Mmm…”

“Reece, love.” I repeated, glancing at the clock out of the corner of my eye.  My class would begin in just under an hour.  Though class was the farthest thing from my mind at the moment, I did not wish to be late.

"Five more minutes…” Reece mumbled, turning over to put his face into the pillow.

I frowned and tugged his arm. “Reece, we must speak.”

Reece’s eyes shot open and his head snapped up.  “What?”

“I am pregnant.” I said.

Reece blinked twice, and his mouth dropped open.  “You… you what?”

I sighed and pushed myself up off the bed.  “Hale was right… perhaps I have ruined all my chances of ever graduating.”

Reece seemed oblivious to my mutterings.  He stared at the wall, his eyes still wide.  “You’re pregnant?”

“And even if I am able to graduate… it will be difficult to find employment.  I shall have an infant to care for!”  I continued, pacing the floor.

“You’re pregnant…” Reece whispered.  A small twinkle appeared in his eyes.

 “Am I even ready to be a mother?”  I whirled around to face Reece as he rose from the bed.  “My own mother was absent so often during my childhood.  I do not wish to become her… but oh how I wish she were here!  She would have warned me against acting so rashly...”

Reece silenced me with a peck to the lips.

“Stop that.” he said.  “Look… we might not have planned it this way, but that doesn’t mean we can’t handle it.”  He frowned.  “And Hale is never right.”

I let out a nervous laugh and nodded my head.  Reece wrapped his arms around me and I lay my head against his chest.  “But I worry…”

“Don’t.”  Reece said, shaking his head.  “We can figure this out.  Somehow.”  He rubbed slow circles into my back, and the small twinkle was back in his eyes.  “I bet she’ll have your eyes.”

I pursed my lips together and ran a hand over my stomach.  “What makes you believe it will be a ‘she’?”

“My wizard’s intuition.”  Reece said, wiggling his eyebrows.

I giggled, my fears momentarily forgotten.

But such fears cannot be forgotten forever.  For the first month, I grew ecstatic with anticipation.  My mind filled to the bursting with dreams and I grew drunk from all the congratulations and well-wishes.  Other than the spats of morning sickness, I felt as strong and healthy as ever.  I even dared to hope that I could carry my child to term with no interruption to my education.

Then the stretch marks appeared and the backaches began.  My feet swelled, my head ached, and my emotions went on a wild rampage.  I missed deadlines, was late for my internship, and spent the majority of my class time running to the bathroom.  Some of my professors were sympathetic, but others were not.  My grades suffered.

Daria and Nirina visited one evening just before finals, and I was a tearful horror to behold.

“I think it would be best if you took next semester off.”  Daria advised me.  “You can’t take a full credit load all the way into your third trimester.”

Oh, what did she know of trimesters?  Her child was taking root in the backyard!

“But then I will not be able to graduate in the spring!”  I sniffled.  “I wanted to walk the stage with Nirina...”

Nirina shook her head and squeezed my hand.  “Awww… no.  That tickles my scales, really.  But you’d just make me feel bad for taking so reaping long.”

I held out hope until my finals were in and I officially failed two classes.  Defeated, I told my advisor that I would not return until the following fall and went on official leave from my internship.

All winter long I sat on the couch and ate whatever I craved while reading Harlequin novels and watching soap operas.  By the time January arrived and the academic year carried on without me, I was feeling marginally better about my decision. 

Daria’s baby sprouted at the first sign of spring.  And what an adorable little sapling she was!  Daria and Lief named her Yasmin.

But her arrival only served to compound my own fears.  Holding her squirming, squalling body both kindled my heart and put my nerves on edge.  I worried that I would do something incorrectly like hold her too tight or feed her too much, and inadvertently hurt her.

“Relax!” Daria said, taking Yasmin back after I had voiced my concerns.  “You were doing just fine.  You shouldn’t worry too much.”

But I did worry.  Her words of reassurance did not comfort me, though they were precisely the words I wanted to hear. 

Only, I did not want to hear them from Daria.  I wanted to hear them from someone else.  Someone who was not present, and whose absence I was beginning to feel more and more each day.

“Monte Vista.”  Orland hissed, his finger crushing into the disconnect button on his cordless phone.  “The bastard liquidated his assets and moved to Monte Vista.”

“It’s not all bad, dear.  At least we know where he went.”  Eldora patted him on the back.

Orland grunted an acknowledgement and dialed a number into the phone.  “Small blessings.  Pack your bags… we’ll take the first plane out of Dragon Valley tomorrow.”

“Tomorrow?”  I exchanged a worried look with Reece.

Reece stood up, shaking his head.  “You can’t leave!  You’ve been home less than a year, and it’s the longest you’ve stayed in one place since I was in high school!  Sophia’s about to give birth!  Don’t you want to see your grandkid?”

At the mention of my child, Eldora’s eyes seemed to dim with sadness.  Orland sighed, and hung his head, but pressed the phone to his ear.

“If we don’t act now, while we have a solid lead, then we give him time to slip away from us.”  Orland said, his voice low.

“But is it really that important?”  Reece’s hand clenched where it rested on the table.  “Gaia and Constantine are locked up!  Whatever Thane might have or might not have been doing for them is kind of a moot point now… isn’t it?”

“Someone who dismantles a multi-million dollar company and then flees the country has something to hide.”   Orland said firmly.  He pressed a hand to the receiver and shook his head.  “I’m sorry son.”  He put his hand down and turned from the dining room table.  “I need to book a flight to Monte Vista….”

I put my hand over Reece’s and his fingers relaxed.  He glanced down and flashed me a weak smile.  I tried to smile back, but my own heart was quickly sinking.  My weekend with my beloved in-laws was already over before it had really begun.

I waddled around the master bedroom, helping Eldora pack.  When at last her suitcase was full, she patted my protruding stomach with a few coos. 

“I expect to meet you when I get home.  A little one needs her grandmother.” Eldora lifted her head and winked at me.

“Grandmother.”  I repeated, my expression growing blank.

Reece went out to stand on the sidewalk and wave to them as they drove away, but I shuffled into the bedroom and plopped down on the bed.  After a few minutes Reece peeked his head in the doorway.

“Sophia, are you okay?” he asked.  I did not reply.  He slid into the chair by the bedside and scooted closer. “I’m pretty angry at them myself, and they’ve been doing this to me since I was a kid…”

“Not them.”  I said, shaking my head.

Reece stopped, pursing his lips together.  He scooted closer and wound his fingers through mine.  “Then, what’s the matter?”

I turned over to face him, and found myself fighting back tears as I spoke. “It’s just… it’s all overwhelming and I want… I need…”  I closed my eyes and shook my head, the tears running freely down my face.  “Oh, pestilence and murder!  I tire of aches, the fears, the constant desire to turn to her!  One of the most important experiences in my life and she should be here!  And she isn’t!”

“She…?”  Reece blinked, and then his voice dropped lower.  “Oh.  Your mother.”

I breathed out and brushed at the tears at the corners of my eyes. "Yes.”

"Sophia…” Reece sighed, squeezing my hand.

I sat straight up. “I miss her. I think about her sometimes and I wonder... if she wanders the Netherworld as I did. Maybe she lay down centuries ago… and let her soul waste away into oblivion.” 

Reece’s eyes widened and he shook his head. He reached out to touch my forehead. “Oblivion? No… Sophia... she’s in a better place.”

I flinched away.  “What better place?  The Netherworld?”

Reece’s hand dropped back down to his side.  His voice lowered to little more than a whisper.  “I don’t believe that the Netherworld is all there is.”

I clenched my teeth and struggled to push myself up off the bed, swatting Reece’s hands away when he reached out to assist me.  “And what basis do you have for this belief?  Have you died?”

He watched me stride across the room to the door with a helpless expression on his face.  “It can’t be all there is, Sophia.  It just can’t be how it all ends.”

I clenched my teeth, and threw the door open.  It slammed into the wall with a thunderous bang that made Reece flinch.  “Believe it!  The Netherworld is where the soul goes to die.”

“Sophia!”  Reece shouted after me, but I quickened my pace.

“Leave me alone.”  I whispered, grasping the car keys by the front door and racing out to that dreadful Jalopy by the front curb.

 Reece raced after me until he was a tiny speck in the rear-view mirror, and when he disappeared my phone rang again and again in my front pocket.  I drove aimlessly, and finally stopped at the center of town.  When I tired of driving, I parked the Jalopy and heaved myself out of the car.

My phone rang again.  I pulled it out of my pocket and shut it off with an oath.  For the moment, I just wanted to be alone.

I wandered through the plaza, and found myself trudging down the pathway to town square.  With the sun dipping low on the horizon, the park was quickly emptying of people.  A couple brushed past me, hand in hand.  Behind them, a young girl clasped the corner of the woman’s skirt.

“Mommy!  Look!” she shouted.

The sound of her sweet, innocent voice sent a stab of pain surging through my heart.  I ducked my head down.

I stopped in front of the towering golden statue.  My eyes stayed fixed on the ground, on the golden plaque inscribed at the warrior’s feet.

Sophia Carol, Heroine of Dragon Valley.

Heroine.  I sniffled and dabbed at the corners of my eyes.  Where was my mother's statue?  She had been a warrior too.  She had slain dozens of the beasts before she too tragically perished by fire.  She deserved recognition more than I.

I turned around, winding my arms around my swollen midsection.  A lone figure sitting at one of the picnic tables on the far side of the square caught my eye, and I started.

She was looking back at me.

I glanced back behind me, and then turned to face her again.  Her eyes remained fixed on me, her expression unreadable.  I took a deep breath, and took a few cautious steps in her direction.  Her eyes stayed on me, moving up as I walked closer.  My palms began to sweat.  I stopped just in front of her, and opened my mouth to speak, but said nothing.  I bit down on my lip.  What should I say?

She stared back at me, unblinking.

“Um... hello.”  I said at last, shifting uncomfortably on my feet.  “This might sound strange... but... have we... have we ever met before?”

 She was silent for a long moment.  I shifted back, biting my lip.

“So you do remember.”  she said, a dry smirk curling at the corners of her lips.

A chill crept up my spine.  Was it really possible?

“Who... who are you?” I asked.

Her smile vanished.  “I guess it was too much to hope that you would also remember my name.”

She rose to her feet, her black hair shifting over her shoulders as she did.  “But I knew you the instant I first saw you.  It was here... in this park.  Almost four years ago now.  My, my... it's miraculous how much you've accomplished in such a short amount of time.  An almost full university education, wed...”  Her eyes drifted down my form.  “... pregnant even.  Remarkable.  For a dead woman.”

My hands suddenly felt ice cold and goosebumps prickled over my arms.  I draped my arms protectively around my womb and took a step back.  Now that I looked her straight in the eye, I could see even more of the subtle differences between her and Kitsune.  Her jawline was stronger, her expressions were somehow harder.  Her face reminded me of someone else, though I could not think of who...

“Who are you?”  I asked again.  “You look like Kitsune, the prophetess of the Valley, but you are not.”

She laughed then, the corners of her lips turning up again.  “It's been so long since anyone's pointed out the resemblance to my grandmother.  I'd forgotten.”

“Grandmother?”  I repeated, my brow furrowing.  No, that was still impossible.  It had been too long.  All of Kitsune's grandchildren must have surely perished by now.

“I don't expect you to remember me.  We met so briefly.  And I was only a girl.  But I never forgot your face.  You are a difficult person to forget, Sophia Carol.  My father said so too, the first time he recognized you.”

Father.  I swallowed down a sudden surge of bile in my throat.  Who could her father have been? 

I shifted through my memories, struggling to remember the faces and the names of Kitsune's granddaughters.  Gwenivere?  No, that young woman had borne Kitsune’s famous amber eyes, I was certain of it.  Hwin?  But that little urchin had possessed red hair...  

There was only one dark-haired granddaughter of Kitsune that I could recall.  Her name had been… Tessla?  Tessa?  It was so long ago, and the memories flickered in and out of focus.

I shook my head.  “It's not possible... any granddaughters of Kitsune would be.... should be...”

She laughed again.  “Long dead.  As should you.”  She smiled then, and held out her hand.  “Why don't you come back to my apartment with me?  I can explain everything.”

I looked down at her outstretched hand.  Unease fluttered in the depth of my stomach.  Or was it my child moving?  I could no longer tell.  My instincts screamed that I could not trust this woman.  Still...  I craved answers more than anything else.

I lifted my hand and reached for hers.  Her lips curled up into a smile.  Our fingers were inches from touching.

“Sophia!”  I heard Reece's voice behind me.

I pulled my hand back and turned.  Reece raced towards me, his expression one of relief.  I smiled when I saw him, and I stepped in his direction.  Though I had run to avoid him, seeing him running towards me soothed my wayward heart.

The woman beside me let out an oath and jerked backwards.  At that moment, Reece's eyes shifted from me to her.

His eyes widened in terror.  He jerked his wand out of his tunic, light bursting from the tip.

“Sophia, get away from her!” he shouted in a panic.

“Why... what...?”  I stammered, stumbling backwards.

When I turned my head to glance back at her, the woman had a wand in her hand.  Her eyes were narrowed, and she crouched into a fighting stance.  In one lightning quick motion, she seized me by the arm.  I let out a scream, and she pressed the point of her wand into my neck.

“Take one more step, and I'll send her back to the Netherworld!”  she hissed.

“Let her go...”  Reece said, his voice shaking.

“I don't think so!  I'm the better spellcaster and you know it.  I can take off her head in less time than it takes you to cast a deflection!”

She dragged me backwards as she spoke.  My heart was pounding, my fingers clawing at her hands.  All the while my mind was reeling as I stared back at my husband with wide-eyed terror. 

Reece knew her?  How was that possible?

“I said let her go!”  Reece repeated, the end of his wand glowing molten hot.

“She's coming with me.”  The woman shouted.  A spark snapped at the end of her wand and I let out a cry of pain.  Reece flinched, his eyes widening as he stared back at me.  “So drop the wand, you sniveling little thief and I might let her live a little while longer!”

Thief.  The word ignited a flash of memory in my mind.

Quintessa.  That had been the name of Kitsune's dark-haired granddaughter.

Memories snapped into focus.  A tall, ebony haired man with ice-blue eyes who scavenged the corpses of dragons with a rusted iron sword.

When he looked at me, I felt as though a shudder ran through my soul.  His gaze had always been cold, empty.  I believed they served as a window to his black conscious.   He was the kind of man who would stroke the cheek of his child with hot dragon blood still dripping from his fingers.

 I do not believe I had ever known his name, but that did not matter.  I knew it now.  Constantine.  He had been the husband of Kitsune’s eldest daughter.  What had happened to Kitsune’s eldest and when Gaia had entered the picture to become his wife, I did not know.

But the fate of the dark haired little girl who lingered in his shadow was clear.  She had taken the youth elixir with him, and survived.  She had followed his lead as he raged a cold war against the other clans.  She had been the woman Reece had stolen the Philospher's Stone from.

“You're... Quintessa Lucian!”  I gasped out loud.

She clasped her hand over my mouth.

“Shut up!” she hissed.

Her ice blue eyes were narrowed at me.  Taking advantage of her momentary distraction, Reece surged forward, icy vapor flooding from the tip of his wand.

“You shut up!”   he snapped.

Quintessa screamed, flinching backwards and letting me go.  The vapor poured over her face and icicles formed on her teeth and eyelashes.

She took off racing towards the street.  Reece bolted after her, muttering a string of curses.

At that moment, I felt as though two iron hands clenched themselves around my womb.  I doubled over, crying out.

“Reece!”  I cried.  My knees grew weak beneath me and I fell forward, my hands slamming into the pavement.  “Reece!”  I cried again, frantic.

I clenched my hands into fists on the walkway, breathing heavily.  A second surge of pain coursed from my back to the center of my stomach, and I whimpered.  All of the blood seemed to drain from my limbs, leaving me quaking with cold, uncontrollable fear.

I heard Reece’s and Quintessa’s footsteps pounding farther and farther away.  My eyes watered from pain, and dread.  I crumpled against the ground.

“Reece… please…”  I gasped, my voice barely audible to my own ears.

Warm arms wrapped around me, and I felt his lips press into the base of my neck.

“Shhh!  It’s okay.  I’ve got you.”  he whispered in my ear as he lifted me up.

The ordeal lasted twenty-six agonizing hours.  It was early morning when I finally heard the cries of my newborn daughter.  She was early, and underweight, but otherwise healthy.

Daria managed to worm her way into the team of nurses who assisted me.  She cut the umbilical cord and cleaned my daughter up shortly after she entered this world.  Then, she wrapped her in a white blanket and gave her back to me.

“Told you she would have your eyes.”  Reece said, kissing my ear.

“What are you naming her?”  Daria asked, smiling at she stared down at the newborn baby.

I exchanged a knowing smile with Reece.

“Evangeline.  Evangeline Lewis.”  I whispered.  Then I kissed my daughter’s wrinkled forehead.